Dear Helen

Dear Helen,

We hear you’re living in Scoville now

Past the lake where the soldiers wash their clothes

Next to the market where the minotaur works

In a little house

With little windows

That you can barely see out of

And dark curtains that hang over them

Like the mirrors of a mourner

In the heart of his grief

Do you know what we hear now

At the church to Athena?
Or at the picnics

While the goats are roasting

And the virgins dance?

We hear—

‘How is your niece Helen doing?’

And we have to smile

And tell them about your wedding

The one we won’t be attending

Because it takes place

At the altar of an enemy

A kidnapper

A man with no god

And no principles

Who takes, takes, takes

Which is not unlike a man

But which is nothing

To be celebrated

We walk around the park

In our sneakers

And sweaters

Because the weather

Has a chill now

That even the memory of summer

Can’t scare away

And in the middle of the park

There’s a pond

And in the center of the pond

There’s a little boat

A toy

And on it sits a little doll

And we’ve named that doll Helen

And we yell things at her

As we walk around in circles

Things like—

‘Come back, Helen’

Or—

‘Don’t come back, Helen’

We’re not sure

We’re not sure if we’re proud of you

Or ashamed

Or if we feel sad

Or lost

Or if you’re still you

Or somebody else now

When you were little

You’d call us Auntie This and Auntie That

And we’d hide behind doors

So you could find us

And when you did

We’d scoop you up

And promise never to hide again

Because it made you sad

When you thought we’d gone

And now you’re gone

And we don’t know

Which door

You’re hiding behind

People ask us

If you love the man

Who took you

What should we say?

That you didn’t

But you do now

Because a woman will always learn

To love a man

If she has no other choice?

That you did

And that you betrayed us all

By hiding such a grievous feeling

From those closest to you?

That you didn’t

And you still don’t

And every night

You sit in a locked room

In an old house

With windows too small to see through
Wondering when someone

Will come to rescue you?

That you go to the aquarium

Fifty miles out of town

And stare at blue fish

Wondering if you should have jumped off the boat

And given yourself to the sea

Rather than to a man

Who says he loves you

While he twists your arm

Or barks in your ear?

We hear that people see you sitting in your car

In the driveway

Lights on in the house

The sound of a television

Doors opens

Water running

Nobody else at home

We hear that you sit there in your car

And people drive by

And you can’t go anywhere

Because your husband

Keeps the keys

And leaves the car doors unlocked for you

So you can sit in the driver’s seat

And feel like you’re about to go somewhere

But you never are

And you never will

And the dinner needs to be made

And the floors need cleaning

And behind every door

There’s nobody to scoop you up

And tell you

You’re not alone

We think about traveling

The long road to Scoville

To see if we can find that house

That nobody can find

But once we got there

What would we do?

Look through windows

You can’t see though

And imagine meeting a girl

Who doesn’t exist

A girl with eyes so blue

They belong in an aquarium

A spirit that rivals

That of Athena

And a face that could change the world

And the world was brave enough

To change